We are huge fans of Game of Thrones at Jones IT and as is well known, we are also huge fans of having fun. So in anticipation of the epic finale of our beloved series, I have endeavored to take the world of Westeros and Essos and set it against the tech world of the San Francisco Bay Area. I am imagining a few of my favorite characters as IT people while trying to retain their characteristics. I am certain you will enjoy reading and it might draw a few laughs along the way.
This is written purely in jest and the following characters are not intended to resemble any techie living or dead and any resemblance is purely coincidental :)
Eddard (Ned) Stark
Lord of Windows 7 and new to Apple iOS. A devoted employee and dutiful team lead, he is best characterized by his apparent lack of humor. He strives to always follow the process, regardless of his personal feelings. Ned Stark is the virtuous and honorable senior staff and leader of a team of six. He is the moral compass of the company and is content to remain far from office politics.
His family name, Stark, epitomizes his rigid belief in the process. His boundaries are increasingly tested by the new startup culture that is taking root in the company. Finding himself as a senior figure having to deal with the changing scene of IT, Ned struggles as his sense of responsibility draws him into complex IT projects.
“Brace yourself. Windows is Crashing!”
The Targaryen princess and Dothraki Khaleesi grew up a frightened girl. She was the younger sibling to a more confident and reckless brother who wanted to own an IT company. But through the course of her life, Daenerys grows into a confident and ambitious woman. At the onset, she is motivated by the desire to outdo her brother and excels at fixing the old family computer so that she can play the computer games that she had been denied.
Her experience as the Khaleesi has equipped her with exceptional customer service skills and is able to deal deftly with even the most difficult person. She is kindhearted and liberates her team from overtime and weekend work. However, she is ruthless when required and enforces strict deadlines. Having nurtured three giant fire-breathing skills, she is now a self-assured and commanding team leader who is loved to death by her team.
“I will take what is mine with wire and cloud."
Jon Snow is Ned Stark’s unproclaimed prodigy. He is not yet a proper IT person and often feels himself an outsider. He is highly capable with tools and is an astute problem solver with a knack for piercing observations. Although Jon begins as an outsider but over the course of his life, he finds his place in the Night’s Watch, manning the firewall and keeping the White Hackers at bay.
Jon is very independent and knows how to fend for himself and research his tickets on Stack Overflow. These traits allow him to feel assured about his abilities and so he doesn’t shy away from differing from his colleagues when he thinks their troubleshooting process is wrong. Much like Ned, Jon is uninterested in office politics and is surprised to find responsibilities thrust upon him as he becomes a team leader among the IT noobs. Jon leads without pride and without thought for himself, and he proves a wise and natural leader. His skills, wisdom, and ability to be vulnerable in front of clients, as well as his team, earn him much love from his colleagues.
“The White Hackers don't care if a man's freelancer or employee. We're all the same to them, Bitcoins for their wallet."
Tyrion is a short man with a giant intellect and a sharp tongue. Tyrion comes from a family of business and money. But, as a wine-drinking hipster, he despises the corporate culture, and in turn, is treated as an outsider in his family business. Tyrion is intelligent, witty, well-read and can code with his left hand. Even though he shares his father’s business acumen and political maneuvering skills, he prefers to work in a tech startup.
He doesn’t have any skills with hardware and the one time he tried to disassemble a printer, it spewed black ink and his face still bears the mark. However, he is extremely skilled with software and troubleshooting, so much so that he is the right-hand man of the team leader. In a deeply competitive technology world, Tyrion’s wit, humor, and cunning are his survival mechanism. Even though he can be bitter and cynical, his team likes him as he is entertaining and usually beats them to the punchline.
“Every time we deal with a spammer, we create two more.”
Jaime is arrogant, rash, and short-tempered but he’s also the most gifted techie of the company. He is widely mistrusted as he had caused the sacking of a former manager. He is handsome, incomparably skilled with computers as well as witty. Jamie shares a special bond with Tyrion.
After a hacking attack, much of his tech skills get chopped off and he is left as a mediocre techie. Even though he has done some less than acceptable things in the company, he is still quite popular. This can be attributed to the fact that he has also performed some acts that show him as redeemable. He tells the truth about his misdeeds to his client and he saves a colleague whose computer was under a ransomware attack.
“There are no techies like me. Only me.”
Samwell (Sam) Tarly
Sam is a new hire for the Night’s Watch. He is shy and fainthearted but very smart. Sam is a foodie, loves to read tech blogs but hates to deal with clients. He quickly becomes Jon Snow’s closest buddy manning the firewall and is loyal to him. When he was young, his father tried to make him a customer service stalwart, but his utter lack of interpersonal skills made his father give up on him. Sam wanted to follow his scholarly pursuits but his father forced him to join the network security at a small startup, the Night’s Watch.
He is fond of music and songs, prefers tech blogs over a toolkit, and fears having to use a screwdriver. Despite this, he is highly intelligent, observant and resourceful. He is always up-to-date on the latest in cybersecurity and has troubleshooting processes memorized to a T.
“I can't steal her data. She's a person, not a bot.”
Have you worked with any of the characters above? Or does someone remind you of another Game of Thrones character? Do let us know in the comments. And as always, if you enjoyed reading this post, please share with your friends and other GoT fans.
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